Monday, January 28, 2013

Leiser #aufschrei : Gehen Sie weiter, hier gibt es KEINE Sexismus-Debatte!

(German only, sorry!)

Eigentlich wollte ich zu der #aufschrei Debatte keinen eigenen Blogpost schreiben, weil mir die Zeit zu schade ist, aber ein paar Dinge muss ich dann doch loswerden.

Erster Disclaimer:
Gleich mal vornweg, dieser Post ist sicherlich ziemlich wirr zu lesen, ich schreibe ja auch einfach nur meine Gedanken dazu, fühle mich des Deutschen noch immer nicht wieder zu 100% mächtig und bin auch einfach schon zu verdrossen was das Thema betrifft, hauptsächlich wegen der Aggressivität mit der da vorgegangen und diskutiert wird. Daher will ich auch keine aggressiven, beleidigenden oder sonstwie un-netten Kommentare hier sehen, also spart sie euch gleich, liebe potentielle Anons. Es ist meine Meinung, und wer argumentiert kann mich umstimmen, und wer herumschreit und -pöbelt wird es garantiert nicht schaffen.

Zweiter Disclaimer:
Diese Debatte leidet unter der Vermischung von Sexismus, sexueller Belästigung und sexueller Gewalt. Das ist ein Problem, da vor allem wenn man gemäßigtere Meinungen zum Thema Sexismus vertritt (so wie ich) vermutlich recht schnell den Eindruck erweckt jemanden, der Opfer sexueller Gewalt wurde, zu verletzen und das, was der Person passiert ist als Lappalie abzutun. Das will ich ganz bestimmt nicht.

Ich will damit auf keinen Fall jemandem, dem so etwas passiert ist, absprechen dass solche Erlebnisse einfach nur Scheiße sind. Genauso wenig will ich Personen, die nicht in der Lage sind, die Grenzen anderer zu respektieren, in Schutz nehmen.

Was ich will, ist versuchen zu erklären, wieso ich glaube das diese Debatte so wie sie im Moment geführt wird, und Feminismus im Allgemeinen, wie er im Moment betrieben wird, nicht funktionieren kann oder zumindest für mich nicht funktioniert. Was ich aber an dieser Stelle auch betonen möchte, ist dass ich die Tatsache, dass es den #aufschrei gibt, und Frauen so offen über ihre Erlebnisse reden könne, ausgesprochen wichtig und gut finde. Man muss darüber reden. Aber man muss eben auch miteinander reden, und einander zuhören, sonst kommt am Ende nichts dabei heraus. Und weil dann über ein paar Artikel und Blogposts Marke "Du bist ein Mann? Deine Meinung interessiert mich nicht - du hast in dem Thema nichts zu sagen!" lese, muss ich eben doch meinen Senf dazu geben, weil ich der Meinung bin, dass wer kommuinzieren will, und wer verlangt dass Kommunikation verbessert wird, in diesem Fall auch die andere Seite anhören muss.

Saturday, January 26, 2013

Money makes the world go round

A few days ago I payed my rent for the last time, which made me realize how much money of my grants I have still left. For quite a long while I had more money than when I first came to Finland, due to our deposit from the old flat being paid back etc. Now I booked a trip to Lapland for me and my boyfriend which is going to be rather expensive, but I think it will really be worth it, and am looking forward to it!

I haven't been shopping since I bought myself a pair of warm boots in December, but I don't really feel the 'need' to buy something. I am mostly sitting around at home, not going out or anything, and don't feel like wearing nice clothes. 
There are, however, somethings I'd really really love to have and I think I might buy them when I'm back in Austria :) Of course I will save most of it, since I will have to spend a lot of money on renovating my flat this summer, but I will probably order some stuff at Bodyline and maybe another wig - I'd love to have something colorful like blue or pink/purple! I was shortly thinking about ordering this dress after I immediately fell in love with the print when they showed it around the end of last year, but considering the price I am not satisfied with the type of velvet they used.... but maybe if I find it somewhere used one day I might buy it :)

Bodyline skirt I'd like to buy - I fell in love with that print a while ago and I'd really like to have the black version!

Saturday, January 19, 2013

Meanwhile, 1700km from here

While copying photos from my phone to my computer I realized I totally neglected the second week of my holiday at home in Austria and didn't even talk about my return to Finland here on my blog.
Well, yeah, obviously I am already back in Turku again, since the 5th. In case somebody was confused :)
I was too lazy to write up a diary entry blog post about it all before, but here it is now, just so that I don't forget it or anything.

Strangely, while at home I was encountering so many things (and people, of course) I had missed while I was in Finland, but also, I somehow felt... like an alien. Now I am back in Finland I feel totally bored most of the time, mainly because I don't have so many friends, but also because... well, there's simply not much to do in this town, compared to Vienna :'D

I was busy almost every day while I was in Vienna, and it was a nice feeling. But unfortunately it also made time pass by really quickly...

I really have a love-hate-relationship with Vienna.

Sunday, January 13, 2013

Burn like a supernova

Do you know what it feels like to look into a mirror and see a stranger's face? Do you know what it means to some days not even recognize yourself?

My mood and the things happening around me often influence how I see myself. If I like my face or not, if I am content with my body or not, if I feel okay or just like dying because I think I am so ugly.
But always, even on the brightest, happiest day, when I look into the mirror, I see a person I most often don't want to be reminded of. Not because I hate him, but because I made to the decision that it's best to not think about him every day. But looking in the mirror reminds me of him, every single day of my life.

Why all the crappy cell phone cam pictures, you may ask? THIS. Or, actually because my arms are too short to take nice pictures of myself with my dSLR.

Wednesday, January 9, 2013

Accidents happen (in the bath)

Well if you follow my twitter you probably already now of my adventure last night - if not, let me tell you a little story that starts like all good stories should begin: "Ollut suihkussa..." - She was in the shower...

Haha, just kidding ;) Anyway, it's not really interesting, I just want to write down what happened for the sake of "diary-keeping", but it's probably not really interesting to you ^^"
Well but it's true, I was in the shower washing my hair, when I suddenly slipped. I never realized how extremely slippery the floor in my shower/bathroom is, but now I can't help but think how lucky I am that it had not happened before already!
Everything happened much faster than I could realize, and since I have a walk-in-like shower, I slithered through half of my tiny bathroom before I landed with my full weight on my tailbone - and hit the back of my head on the ceramic-tiled wall.

Tuesday, January 1, 2013

Cinderella's New Year's Eve

Happy New Year everyone!
Did you have a great time yesterday, were you out partying or did you celebrate with close friends in private? However you spend the last day of the old year, I hope you had a great time! I certainly did!

As I already mentioned I got invited to "Le Grand Bal" (The Great Ball) which is a ball on new year's eve held every year at the Hofburg in Vienna and previously called "Kaiserball" (Emperor's Ball). The Hofburg is one of the most impressive, beautiful buildings along the Ringstraße (which is definitely worth a long walk if you ever come to Vienna!), particularly the "Neue Burg", the newest part of the castle. I was incredibly excited to go there and very very nervous, after all it is a very fancy and posh event, which even some celebrities and political figures attend. I really felt like Cinderella, a peasant girl invited to a royal ball, haha!

I apologize for the bad photo quality, but I only had my cell phone with me... And it was hard enough to cram that in my mini handbag already XD